Expectations and Focus

While speaking with a young lady about a situation with her husband, she expressed how upset she became during one of their arguments. She was angry because she felt that he was not attending to her emotional needs properly. As she told me her side of the story, I kept hearing the phrases "he's not doing what I expect of him"; "he's not worried about my feelings"; and "he's not doing what I asked him to do." As she concluded she said... "you know what, I'm going to stop expecting anything from him... I'll lower my expectations so I won't continue to be hurt and angry." As I pondered her words, I began to ask the Holy Spirit for words of wisdom and comfort for her. Here's what he had me relay: "Often times we get angry or upset when others don't give us what we expect in a relationship. As a result our feelings are hurt, we get angry, lash out and can become controlling by using our emotions to manipulate the other party. God said, you don't need to lower your expectations... you need to redirect your focus!"

What a powerful word because as long as we are focused on what we are not receiving from others, we'll remain on emotional roller-coasters. A redirection of focus allows the attention to be removed from your emotions, and directed towards your goals. When you stop dwelling on what you are not receiving, you open up the frequency for God to tell you what He is expecting from you! As his children, God expects us to uphold his holy standards of living... even when we are upset. If we're not careful and we will fall into negative emotions, and allow them to dictate actions. This is dangerous, as it allows the enemy the opportunity to steal your peace, kill your love, and destroy relationships. Keep this golden nugget in mind the next time someone fails to meet your expectations or your feelings are hurt. Ask the Holy Spirit to redirect your focus towards your kingdom purpose, and don't allow the enemy to distract and dictate your actions. God's love gives us peace and comfort during difficult times, that can not be found from worldly resources.